Hello there! Welcome to bubsicles. This is my newest baby and I hope that I can keep it alive, the same way I have kept my human baby alive. (And mightily cute is he. My human baby, I mean.)

IKR. The epitome of cute and happiness and joy.

And since this is my virtual baby, I thought I’d share its birth story with you.

July 2009 – June 2011
For most of two years, Mr Thick and I struggled with infertility. Or rather, I struggled with infertility. I can safely say that this period of time was the darkest I have ever lived through and I don’t know how I survived it unscathed. During this time, I went through countless blood tests, a laparoscopy, seven IUIs and an IVF. During this time, friends announced their pregnancies, delivered their babies and went on to conceive their second while I remained stubbornly childless, despite my best efforts.

Needless to say, there were a lot of tears and emotional upheaval. Thank goodness for the wonderful thing called the Internetz. I surfed around to seek solace in company and found many, many women sharing their infertility tales online. I decided to break my silence and started talking about our journey on my blog and received many email from those in a similar situation.

July 2011
I discovered that I was pregnant, very unexpectedly so. We were between IVF cycles and had penciled in regional trips!

Bloody Murphy. For the better of two years, I kept my life as still as possible just in case I got pregnant and nothing happened. The moment I decided to sod it and live my life, I hit the baby jackpot.

We were very, very cautious but secretly thrilled.

August 2011 – February 2012
The pregnancy was really good to me. Other than the nausea and fatigue in the first trimester and the pelvic discomfort in the third, I was happy and glowing.

I continued writing and looked online for shared pregnancy tales.

March 2012 – today
After the birth of my son, I went through a bout of depression. I was never diagnosed but I found myself sinking deeper and deeper. It didn’t help that he barely slept in the day. But once we hit week 10 or so, I pulled myself together and decided to accept him for what he is, sleep or no sleep.

Over the past year, the biggest challenge that I have faced is still his lack of sleep. Only this time, his day sleep has stabilised and his night sleep is crap. In any given night, my sleep is interrupted between three to five times and I’m plain exhausted.

Again, the online community has been my greatest source of comfort. It is on the Internetz where I found many, many supportive posts and comments, and learnt from many, many mothers.

And then it hit me that we don’t really have such a community here in Singapore, where women can freely share their experiences and tips and feelings. And so, the idea for bubsicles was planted.

Bringing this to life has been both a mix of exhaustion and excitement. It hasn’t been easy, juggling work and sleepless nights and this, but I am glad that I have done it. All by myself.

This is a place where I can put on my mother hat 100%. And in time to come, I hope to have other women sharing their experiences here, whether they are already mothers or are mothers-to-be.

So I hope you will join me for the ride and please do let me know any thoughts and suggestions that you might have!

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